Bits and Bobs

Sad News First:

A woman with Alzheimer's mysteriously disappeared at DFW 7 years ago. It turns out her remains were found recently, and she died of a blow to the head. Yikes.

Tis the Season:

I have joined Martha Stewart's 6-week Christmas workshop. It's free. Each week, you get a new list of crafty ideas and how to make them. This week's theme is handmade gifts.

Wanda Sykes:

She's just awesome.

Post-Holiday

This weekend was bliss. Everyone went out of town at our house, save for me and Baby G. We went a-hunting Saturday morning for the "best bbq in Texas" in Lexington. We managed to find the town, but the bbq was all sold out when we got there. So we drove NW to Taylor and had some yummy brisket and sausage at another of the top 50 bbq joints.

Sunday brought bike rides and swimming at Barton Springs pool. What a delicious afternoon! The sun was warm, the water chilly, and the quasi-napping state I tranced into after my swim rejuvenating. Shout-out to Nanny and JJ.

Monday Baby G and I did some shopping, dropped off a few bags of donations to Goodwill, and had a leisurely lunch. I took not one, but two naps yesterday. Decadent!

All in all it was a wonderful three days. As you can imagine, it's pretty hard to be at work today.

Gung Hay Fat Choy! 恭喜發財

That's Happy Chinese New Year to yas. It's the Year of the Rat. According to everyone's favorite bargain-basement encyclopedia, those born in the Year of the Rat are:

"leaders, pioneers and conquerors. They are charming, passionate, charismatic, practical and hardworking. ...

Rats tend to have immense control of their emotions, ...Quick-tempered and aggressive, they will not think twice about exacting revenge on those that hurt them in any way. Rats need to learn to relax sometimes, as they can be quite obsessed with detail, intolerant and strict, demanding order, obedience, and perfection.

According to tradition, Rats often carry heavy karma and at some point in life may face an identity crisis or some kind of feeling of guilt. Rats should guard themselves against hedonism, as it may lead to self-destruction. Gambling, alcohol and drugs tend to be great temptations to Rat natives."

Traditionally, Red Packets containing money are given out to loved ones and friends. I've never gotten a red packet, well, at least not one with actual money in it, but I'm not bitter. Ehem, Baby G...

Oprah: Please shut up

Just what is a shiny moment and how exactly does one create one?

Holidays on the Cheap

This year I've been clipping and using coupons, shopping sales, and scoring unique items at thrift stores to take full advantage of my $100 holiday budget. So far, I've gotten all my family's (save for one brother), my squirrelly student workers, and my colleagues gifts, all for $52! How can you do Christmas on the cheap? Easy!

Here are some tips I'd like to pass on for being frugal yet classy this Christmas:

• Craft stores like Joann's and Hobby Lobby have ridiculous sales on holiday crafty shit this time of year. Right now all kinds of stuff is on sale for 40-50% off. Wrapping paper and cards are on sale, so are packing materials and gift tags. If you shop the sales you can get materials to make holiday tokens and cards for everyone in your office for under $15! YES! $15 total.
• Try buying blank postcards or scrapbooking paper. Buy one holiday-themed rubber stamp and stamp pad in the color of your choice, and a set of 25 mini-ornaments. Stamp the cards, sign your name, and punch a hole in the side to tie the ornament on. Voila! Instant coworker gift! No wrapping, taping or gluing required. Best of all, those people that drive you crazy all year will think you're a really nice person. Even better? You're only out a few bucks. (If you shop smart,* that is.)
• Have friends who like weird things or collect oddball objects? Head to the Goodwill and score 99 cent glass tumblers, $2 candle holders, or $3 abandoned but hilarious artwork. You can also get cool things like tennis rackets, coffee mugs, funky lamps, and funny/hip t-shirts for ridiculously low prices. Not only is the item probably one of a kind, but the purchase price goes toward helping someone get a job. Win-win, eh?
• Christmas cookies. Who doesn't love cookies? It's not like they're hard to make, either. After you bake them, place them in clear cellophane bags and tie with holiday-colored ribbon. Pass 'em out like candy. Oh, candy in a gift bag is another cheap but welcome gift! You can theme this idea to whatever holiday it is you celebrate.
• Time. Know someone who hates grocery shopping or can't get out to the dry cleaners regularly? Make a coupon book. Yep, one of those dork-ass but lovable coupon books full of favors. The recipient turns in a coupon, you do what it says. Since you're making the gift, don't put anything on the coupons you don't want to do, like grocery shopping or going to the dry cleaners. Doing that would just be stupid.
• Mix-CDs are always cool. Come on, you've got a huge stash of CDs and an even-bigger collection of mp3 files, why not burn a disc and make purty artwork for it? Who cares if it's a CD full of heavy metal hits and the recipient is wayyy into John Tesh? Think of your gift as a cultural exchange or at least a ticket out of Lamesville for them.
• Hard liquor. This time of year can be stressful. A cheap bottle of booze can go a long way for someone who's stressed out from shopping, decorating, or pretending to enjoy their family's company during the holidays! Make sure to buy it in a plastic bottle -- that way when that special someone reaches the bottom of said bottle and lobs it at the nearest relative, nobody gets seriously hurt.

So there you have it! Some easy and cheap tips for gift giving and holiday survival! May your wallet remain fat, your thighs thin, and your sanity intact! Seasons Greetings and to all a good night!

*S-Mart. Duh.

Organic turkey and all

Well, another Thanksgiving has come and gone. Whew! Now we just have to swim through the craziest month of the year and come out the other side mostly awake and somewhat sane. Can you dig it?

Oh wait...presidential primaries start January 8th...forget the part about being somewhat sane. That will only happen for highly-evolved creatures. I don't count myself as one of those, robot or not.

What Would Jesus Buy?

That's the question posed by this documentary of the same name.

I like Christmas. Not for religious reasons, but because it's the time of year that everyone seems to be nice to their fellow human beings just because. I really love giving presents and I also enjoy getting them. Sure, presents are nice, but who really needs that 3rd DVD player, the $35,000.00 dragon topiary, or that expensive gizmo that's just going to sit in the garage? The greed in the air can get quite breathtaking. The load of commercial consumerist crap seems to grow larger and larger every year, but I try to tune that out and enjoy the carols, the lights, and most of all, the food.

I saw stores putting out Christmas decorations and other holiday swag for sale in September this year. (Or was it August?!) There are already countless reports of how our economy desperately depends on holiday sales. Wow, there's unnecessary pressure for ya. I also know that I won't have any more money the month of December than I did in November, so I won't be cruising on guilt, economic or otherwise, and rushing out to buy gifts for everyone.

In fact, I plan on making gifts this year for people instead of buying them. Here's an idea: let's see if I can't have a gift for everyone I need/want to give one to and not spend over $100.00 USD. As in, $100.00 for all the gifts I'm giving this season, not each one. This means I'll make almost everything, or be creative with store-bought things.

Oh! The challenge is on, people! Let's make this Christmas The $100 Christmas. You can't spend more than $100 on holiday gifts on or before Dec 25th. That includes every trinket you buy for coworkers, the present you'll give your mom, the gift for your little nephew, etc. Also, you can offer services or barter for gifts, and buy secondhand to save something from the landfill. Join me! Don't go into debt this year! Feel good about sharing and caring. Avoid the mall! Figure out the meaning of truly giving to someone else, as in, sacrifice a little. It's worth it to see the smile on the recipient's face and still feel the jangle of change in your pocket.