Oh! The Childrenz...
I sometimes wonder if my not having children has made me an 'outcast' in some circles. Luckily, my personal circle of friends neither contains any parents, nor cares that they have not reproduced. However, at work I am the only one of my colleagues who does not have children, and sometimes I either A) get left out of whole conversations, or B) don't get the same 'privileges' my colleagues do (staying home w/ sick kids, bringing kids to the office during work hours, leaving early to pick kids up from ballet/football/violin, soliciting for cookies or candy or band trips, etc).
Now I certainly don't mean to imply that I'd push out a kid simply to have a reason to chitchat at work or stay home [with a flu-ridden rugrat]. Oh contraire! But I do disdain the dichotomy between parents and nonparents. In an era where celebrity pregnancies are frontpage news and every f*ckin' place from the local restaurant or bookstore to Dirty Jim's Saloon* has to be "family-friendly," kids and their influence are everywhere. Is it wrong that I don't have kids and I want a break from all the people that do?!
What really bothers me is all these uber-pampered babies are growing up to be uber-pampered adults who only want to be rich and lazy. All these parents who are bff with their kids make me sick. My parents weren't my best friends when I was a kid; hell, they weren't even my friends! But that's the point --- they weren't supposed to be my friend, they were supposed to be my parent.
Woo! I don't know what inspired this particular rant this morning. Perhaps it was Cloying Girl's bragging about her daughter getting into some dance class or something.
CG: OMG! [Daughter] got into the highest level class! Oh! [Insert unspoken line here --- What did your daughter do lately? Oh wait, you don't have one.]Me: Yeah, that's so great. I'm. So. Happy. For. You...
Eh, what can you do? I don't know. Not all kids or parents are bad. I know this...
I need some coffee.
5 comments:
I've felt like that before. You do feel like you haven't "joined the club" since a child has not spurted from your loins (or your s.o.'s loins) but really, what's the rush? When I did work in that environment, I had to ask one of the other ladies to tell me what was so great about kids because I just heard the negativity. It was good birth control, I'll tell you what.
Sorry that you have to deal with it. Maybe you can coin a phrase to say when they start blabbing like "Oh, I never took dance because of my arthritis" or "Oh, I never got into that program because of my gimp knee." Eventually, they may stop spewing their vicarious life stories. Or just think you are riddled with maladies.
~The Booklahver
How did you know about my arthritis and gimpy knee?
But seriously, I appreciate the camaraderie. This whole "obnoxious people with kids" thing is really just a personal nusiance. I mean, we have to have kids around, otherwise the human race would end.
I just wish that Those With Offspring didn't consider themselves better than Those Without Offspring.
This can go the other way too, TR. My daughter was born when I was 19. Not too many of my peers had children at the time, and I felt like my youth was passing me by. You can imagine the disconnect in those conversations. I got over all that, but I sometimes become envious of the freedom the kidless enjoy. This isn't to say that having kids equals maturity and responsibility and anyone who doesn't have them is a hopeless misanthrope and reprobate, but the kidless definitely have more latitude in their lives.
All that said, I agree with your post and, in honor of it, will be devoting my next few posts to the most minute of Celeste's accomplishments :)
Thanks, Rup. I didn't get the chance to meet Celeste while I was in Memphis, but then again, you and I didn't see each other very much. (That building was just sooo big!)
I swing from extreme to extreme sometimes re: kids. I'm going to be 30 very soon and I guess my "biological clock" or whatever is ticking.
I just haven't decided whether or not to listen to it yet.
Although I'm not the biggest fan of honor roll bumper stickers or Chuck E. Cheese "piss balls", I do, however, believe that children are our future. Following that line of thought, you can teach them well, put their asses to work, and let them lead the way. As for parents and children being bff, somewhere down the line, the kids-turned-adults can find expensive therapists to show them all the beauty they possess inside. With the dim outlook for social security, give them the sense of pride to make it easier, for us. In all these family-friendly establishments full of urbanite parents, children and potential pedophiles, let the children's laughter remind us how we used to be.
But then again, I decided long ago Whitney & Bobby haven't been good models for parents. Never walk in anyone's shadow! If I fail, if I succeed, at least I know, crap, I don't even know this whole song. Something about dignity? Whitney sang this song?
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