From the fringes of our democracy

"Voting and democracy are boring." Sez who? Here are two stories of just how exciting and/or adventurous going to the polls can actually be. The first one is a veritable hero's journey from my cousin, Iron Monkey, who lives in The Great State of Florida, and who thankfully for the Floridians as well as the rest of the country, no longer has to endure that wacko, Katherine Harris. (Reader's notes: Aubrey is his fearless girlfriend, and one of the things they dig is Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom.)

Last night, I went drinking. I drank something called Kali Ma's Black Death Smoothie. After I drank it the bartender, Moulder Ram, started telling me that I would live in a nightmare in which I would never awake. He was right. I started rolling with neo-cons and ultra con christians. I even tried to indoctrine Aubrey into the fold, and when she disagreed I tried to kill her by dropping her into a sinkhole! Before I suceeded, a fat Cuban kid wearing a NY Yankees cap named Fatround burned the shit out of me with handrolled fatty boom batty. After that buzz, I realized that I no longer walked in Kali's Dream of Black Death. I donned my fedora, machete/katana and saved my woman from the damn neo cons. Then we went and voted for the best candidates in our area.

The second one is from one of the more prolific bloggers out there in the blogoshprere, Wonkette, and is a little more down to Earth, maybe. . . it involves what appears to be a Felix the Cat paperweight, and some smashing. . . . Awesome.

Bonus. That crazy Wonkette has more stories and comments in her Highlights... post.